where chaos did abound, grace did much more abound

hello, april!

this is me. 

 PRE-wanting to scream at the top of my lungs, smoke coming out of my ears, and sobbing my eyes out.

you would not have wanted to be near me on saturday, friends.

 it was just one thing after the other.  for real.

you know that kind of day, right?

the one that starts off with your contacts being in your eyeballs inside out, causing blurred vision and a headache{i figured it out AFTER driving for 1 1/2 hours}.

the kind that you literally speed to make your destination on time{audition time at exactly 11:08 a.m.).  litraleeee.

the kind when your child is distant and cranky because they are nervous about performing in auditions.

the kind where you are distant and a tad cranky for your child.

the kind where you get to spend a glorious lunch at panera with your mom{whom you rarely see}, 

but then the happiness dissolves into anger when you are shopping at TJMAXX, and your boys tip the cart over and cause a huge scene in the majorly bustling store.  again.

the kind when you know you've reached your sane limit and you head over to old navy, despite your gut telling you to go.to.the.car, almost as if you're asking for a panic attack.

it was the kind of day i wanted to be over.  like.  STAT,  but through all the chaos and grumpiness that engulfed me, grace did much more abound.

there were lessons to be learned, and i was the student.

i didn't reach for it in time to correct my mistakes, but i saw it in my mother's eyes, in my children's apologies and thankfulness throughout the stores, and in my husbands sweet love when i got home.

i needed grace. 

 

saturday was a lesson for me.

it taught me that i didn't do the right thing.  again.

sort of like the boys tipping  the cart.  again.  ugh.

i was short with my mom because i was embarrassed.

i was unforgiving towards my children.

i was cranky with my husband.

i was generally unthankful for just about everything.

fail. fail. fail.

but grace, completely unmerited favor, washes over me and makes all things new again.

His mercies are NEW each day.  even when mine aren't.

oh, to be more like Him!

it may have taken me a while to reach for it this time, but i hope that next time when all seems to be crashing down, i look up, and claim the gift that is already mine.

right away.

thank the Lord for grace abounding.

i am SO very undeserving.

"But where sin abounded, grace did much more abound:"
Romans 5:20


xo,
mary

linking up here, here, here and here!
:)